"And then I found out how hard it's to really change. Even hell can get comfy once you've settled in. I just wanted the numb inside me to leave. No matter how fucked you get, there's always hell when you come back down. The funny thing is all I ever wanted I already had. There's glimpses of heaven in every day. In the friends I have, the music I make, the love that I feel. I just had to start again."